I have had many students who want to be able to play something perfectly on the first try, and punish themselves internally when that doesn't happen. Learning violin (also music!) is tricky because of all the concentration and technical/expressive aspects coming together. Because of my experience with Suzuki method, both in my upbringing and my teaching as well as teacher training, I realize I can bring the whole process to a step-by-step level that helps students not only see their progress over time, but helps them learn to believe in their own power to overcome the frustration, or the challenges before them. Suzuki method is pretty much designed for this, but obviously these days we are pioneering the online part of it. (Even if we met in person, I would not want to be close enough to touch each other; some parts of the lesson would be easier, but not all.)
I have a scene in mind that a parent can construct to help their child’s confidence. Kids enjoy seeing videos of themselves doing something they know we appreciate or respect (which you parents have probably noticed!). Without pointing it out to the child, you can let them observe that you enjoy watching the replay of their videos that you may have previously shared with your teacher. Those were measurable moments of accomplishment. They felt good about their project, and you validated that by recording and sharing the performance! Those videos could be mixed in with other videos of proud moments they experienced, viewed while you are having a session of entertainment for yourself, or shared with a relative. You could just watch it on your computer when you know they will notice. Maybe your partner or other family members would like a replay.
One of the techniques in the Suzuki community is the family recital. A student might enjoy getting siblings to join in on a song or dance, and might then also feel encouraged to play a song on violin. Maybe the siblings will sing along. Maybe everyone will sing along! The response from the audience is all clapping or positive comments like Bravo!- there is no evaluation or critique. It should be obvious that this is fun!
Sibling Quartet rehearsing for our monthly Play-In. Thanks to UpbeatMusicApp!
Three pros and one "Suzuki Dad".
Back in the day, my parents strove to cultivate this encouraging and inspiring home environment. I would like to acknowledge the success of their efforts. As the eldest of six, I organized frequent performances, arranged select pieces for us to learn and perform together, and sometimes even pulled our cousins into the act! The fact that my parents and other adult relatives made room in their schedules and their hearts for our childish presentations built confidence in my mind that my efforts were valued, and my siblings and cousins also benefited in their own ways from that vote of confidence. As it happens, several of us went on to careers in music, but you never can tell how the positive experiences found in childhood musical success will contribute to a well-rounded and fulfilled life path, whether or not in a musical career.
Fast-forward to our present pandemic quarantine era, and the impromptu family concerts of old have morphed into a monthly zoom Play-In. Each month, any family member may volunteer to host with their chosen theme, and the performances vary over a spectrum of beginner to advanced, toddlers to grandparents, Lightly Row to Korngold Violin Concerto to Jimi Hendrix to the Spiritual “Hold On Just a Little While Longer”. I treasure these events as a musician and family member, and I attribute that appreciation on my part to having been raised in an environment that supported my musical contributions even before that became my career.
The final presentation. Aunts, nephews, uncles, sisters, husbands, cousins, sons, fun times.
Kudos to all the musical families who celebrate their young (and older!) children’s contributions to the creative environment, and I encourage all parents of young musicians to find a way to incorporate Family Performance Night into their regular routine. I wish you many joys of musical happiness!